Nothing like the last day of March to stage my comeback ey?
Though beware, it’s not a full-blown one yet.
Sorry I’ve been MIA, but 2015 started out with the kind of bang that would make anyone’s head hurt good. Or is that bad?
12 weeks and counting and it’s still not letting up.
- Not one, but two deaths in the family, check!
- Being sucker punched by a lingering flu, check!
- A string of job opportunities inexplicably not working out; check!
- Zayne leaving 1D, check!
Nonetheless, I plan to tiptoe back onto the blog horse, so bear with me. I just needed a few months to reset. To remind myself to keep going, if anything it’s what Beyoncé would do. To remember that I signed up to this not for the big G’s* or the recognition, but to vent somewhat anonymously, kind of creatively.
*Though I’ll happily take the G’s..if anyone’s offering.
On the eve of my birthday – yes folks I’m about to be another year wiser– I couldn’t help but reflect on some thangs.
As much as I would like to wax lyrically about material things I’m hankering for, various projects in the pipeline and lifelong ambitions, I’ll stick to the stuff that has been weighing me down.
As I naively tuned in to the latest instalment of political raunchcom Scandal (too much blubbering over boys Olivia, just too much), I never expected it to teach me a much needed lesson, but such is the power of Shonda I guess. *shoulder shrug*
Stand in the sun, the way I choose to interpret it, is to distance oneself from as much as trifle as humanly possible.
Just stand in the light and let the b******t blow in the breeze.
And in the spirit of brutal honesty, I have failed at that very simple thing again and again this year.
I’ve let things so petty nearly break my spirit, I might as well be illegitimate offspring of Mr Glass.
I repeat stand in the sun.
My mantra from this day on, so help me Kanye.
Anyone else looking over their New Year’s resolutions and ferociously shaking their heads in disappointment/wonder/anime tantrums?
I’ll be honest,well…when am I not?
I’ll be honester. This year has been HUGE in terms of me trying to regain control. Control over my relationships, food choices- gluten stay or gluten go-, sleep patterns, footwear, you name it.
And then something happened.
I got freaking tired.
Don’t know if its August showers or sh&* taking its toll.
Turns out the more you try to control things, the more likely it is that life will dunk an ice bucket on you without you ever seeing it coming.
And you can forget about that towel afterwards.
Oh yeah August has been all about unexpected, unplanned, uninvited changes that I’m learning to roll with it.
So the only control button I’ll be hitting for a while is the one that hangs tight with alt and delete.
Yeah you like that huh?
After much deliberation, I’ve decided to turn a new leaf.
A ghost from the days of future past* told me my tombstone might read a little something like:
“Here lies that petulant little shyster. That broad who couldn’t take a step back. Gain some perspective. Maybe even do a happy dance for a second. She sure was something else. She had a mouth on her too. Do we miss her? I mean REALLY miss her? Show of hands..”
So my new yellow-tinted leaf is all about pausing to say thank you and then retreating to my chambers to continue my vow of bullsh***abstinence.
There’s a long list of people who have been acting as my corner men** and gin-and-juice drinking buddies, and I’m forever in their debt. And by forever I mean until December 31st. New year, new rules baby!
Hey when life gives you lemons, you shut up and build a lemonade stand right? And then you lie in wait for someone gullible to come along and charge em’ extra for it.
*see X-men writers, that still doesn’t read or write good as a title
** a boxing reference from a woman who’s never even watched a match, bravo!
I may need to be schooled on patience
I absolutely need to be schooled on patience.
Yet that hasn’t, nor is it likely to stop me from going with my gut.
Like Captain Kirk* I’ve found that it’s up to you whether you want to play by everybody else’s rules or..NOT.
The past 9.5, 10 weeks have been gut wrenching because I’ve assumed people would come through with their promises, which will always be a rookie move.
Again, much like my good buddy JT Kirk who had to be beat down on multiple occasions**, I learnt the hard way.
It’s ok to say no.
It”s even ok-er to pave your own damn way.
*that’s right born again trekkie here!
**I’m talking the reboot here folks.
the libertine mag
Now I know I’m not the only grown person excited about the new Power Ranger flick?
That’s right those mighty morphing power rangers are making their way back to the big screen.
They even have an acronym and everything; M.M.P.R!
Crickets I hear ey?
I’m disappointed in you people.
You should care because everyone needs an excuse to butter themselves up, slip into a skin tight something and find some baddies to wrestle.
I’ve counted 17 legit reasons this month alone I would benefit from a superhuman alter ego:
The tax man
All the sidewalk shuffling men and women of London.
hoodlums kids partaking in tomfoolery at 4am
An endless stream of emails about..well let me just spare you the remaining 14!
*all the side hustlers out there know what I’m talking about.